I Won’t Be Serving Kool-Aid

Let me be clear. I am a Sikh.

But I have no intention of becoming a Sikh Guru.

I am not a guru. I am a person.

I recognize that I’m not a regular person. I’m a little out there, I will admit that.

I’m a spiritual person who happens to believe she is experiencing communication with god. I am not the only one on earth right now experiencing this. There are many people who believe god is talking to them. There have been many people in history who believed god was speaking to them.

And more importantly, god speaks in many ways, not just words. His usual mode of communication is through experience. God literally speaks to every single person in some manner or another.

It is a radical thing to admit that you are having a two-way convo with god.

I remember when I was in a psych ward and told the nurse that I was talking to myself. She said it was OK as long as I didn’t get a response.

Well, what can I say? I finally got a response.

It can be a dangerous thing to say that you are holy in any kind of way. People like to kill holy people and then make martyrs out of them. It is a sick and twisted thing people have been doing since the beginning of time.

My father told me half-jokingly that I should become a guru. I said no.

God told me I am a prophet. I said I don’t understand what that means.

The word guru just means teacher. I am a teacher. But in a religious context, the word guru has a lot of implications. In Sikhism, the Tenth Guru said that there would be no more living gurus. The Guru Granth Sahib, or the Sikh Scriptures, is now the only living guru.

So who am I, and what place do I have in this world?

I’m a writer, a professor, and a Sikh.

My goal is not to enlighten the world. My goal is not to lead the masses to the Sat Yug, or the Age of Truth. Look it up if you don’t know what I’m talking about.

I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do. I’m still Waiting for Godot to give me instructions.

Photo courtesy of Marie Dashkova via Scopio

My goal is to express myself. My goal is to express some of the things that god wants me to express on his behalf.

That’s it. That’s all.

Do I want to help people understand spirituality and god? Sure, why not?

I’m not going to start a revolution. Although I will join one. Maybe we need one.

According to Eastern philosophy, we are in Kal Yuga, the Dark Age. It’s similar to the notion of the world ending in Christian theology.

Are we in the end times? I mean, I don’t know, but things look pretty dark from where I’m standing.

In Eastern spirituality, the Dark Age ends, and then we go back into the Age of Truth.

Some people believe that there are now a lot of people on earth who are here to help lead us to the Sat Yug, the Age of Truth.

In the Age of Truth, enlightenment is normal, and love is the way of the masses. There is little to no violence, and the people are highly evolved beings who understand their true spiritual nature.

Am I one of the people who will lead us to Sat Yug? Maybe I could be if I play my cards right. But there is another part of me that believes I could lead myself to hell. I don’t believe in hell, though. I use it as a metaphor for suffering and depression.

So am I a leader? Or am I also someone who is in dire need of a leader?

Both can simultaneously be true.

But I think the real question you should be asking is: Do you really need someone else to tell you what god said? Do you maybe want to take a look around, see what the universe is showing you, and figure out your own spiritual path?

People like me come and go. We say things, we write things. Some of it’s cool, some of it’s interesting. But it can’t replace your own judgment.

Photo courtesy of Marie Dashkova via Scopio

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So how can you verify that I have any spiritual authority?

Apparently, there is no entrance exam into the school of spirituality. You just enter at your own risk.

There are many teachers here. Some call themselves gurus, prophets, avatars, and saints. So how do we know which ones are legit?

Usually, if their message resonates with us, we will follow their lead, provided they aren't abusive, exploitative, or dishonest.

There are a plethora of amazing and brilliant spiritual teachers who have written books and given lectures all around the world.

Am I going to do that? I’d like to.

But for the time being, I’m living in my basement apartment, telling stories about my life. I’m sitting in cafes philosophizing about the universe. I’m teaching college kids how to express their intelligence and their creativity through writing.

Sometimes I entertain the notion that god has something to say to me and that I might have something to say to you.

But we don’t know which way things will go in this new world. People are rightfully screaming and shouting that we are entering a danger zone.

So we will wait and see what happens and how it plays out.

Some of us will say a prayer.

But the best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry.

Maybe things won’t happen the way we plan. Maybe they will be worse. Maybe things will get better.

Honestly, that is up to us.

There is no messiah.

We are the messiah.

And we have come to take back our lives.

nina